Riffhard World Cup: Rage Against the Phish?

So we’re moving on the 90s. Who moves on and who doesn’t? Who Riffed Hardest during the Clinton Administration? For a summary of the rules, click here.

The 90s Group

Round 1.

Come As You Are vs. Killing in the Name of

Results: A tough call here. Come As You Are is a great riff that’s simple, catchy and full of ennui. Killing in the Name of is all anger, bombast and radical politics. I’m giving Nirvana the win, but only because I want them to lose later.

Chalk Dust Torture vs. Enter Sandman

Results: Chalk dust Torture is the best guitar song you’ve never heard because you probably don’t like Phish. I get that. Phish is easy to hate–the fans are annoying and their albums are generally terrible. But, Metallica fans are worse. And Enter Sandman is the kind of thing dudes with long hair who work in Sam Ash play on weird looking guitars. Chalkdust wins. Easy.

Round 2

Killing in the Name of vs. Chalk Dust Torture

Results: This would be a tie, but Chalkdust wins because their cover of Killing in the Name of is real awesome.

Come As You Are vs. Enter Sandman

Results: I only included Enter Sandman so I could make sure it loses. God I hate Metallica.

Round 3

Chalk Dust Torture vs. Come As You Are

Results: A listless draw as both sides play not to lose. The crowd whistles at the refs and then Phish covers Smells Like Teen Spirit and everyone is damn confused.

Killing in the Name of vs. Enter Sandman

Results: A little revenge for everyone’s favorite marketable radicals. Tom Morello rules.

Who’s In?

Chalk Dust Torture and Come As You Are

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1 Comment

Filed under Music

One response to “Riffhard World Cup: Rage Against the Phish?

  1. Margo b

    phish kills it. all the time. where should i go for the heady jams in beijing?

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